season greetings Information indicates that terrorists abroad and in our own back-yard are anticipating near-term attacks that we believe will rival, or exceed, the attacks we had to endure last year around this time of the year. Intelligence gathered in the past 3 and a half minutes indicates that a wave of Powerpoint Season greetings is heading towards our electronic mailboxes, effectively clogging all normal internet traffic and bringing the digital economy to a complete standstill. Gather with your family and friends…. We will show these terrorists this holiday season both our goodwill toward our fellow men, and our readiness and resolve to protect our families. Bwweeuuurrkkk…

To all these Powerpoint terrorist we have only this to say: “Bring it on!”